Goodbye

1997JoshAndEric

I remember the day I met my wife. I remember the days where I met my many friends made in my adulthood. Yet the memories I do not have are of the days where I met my friends who I have known since grade school. All I remember is being their friend. And that is all I needed.

You come up with a lot of silly ideas as a kid. My one friend saw a school bus for sale in the local ads and said we should save up and buy it. We could live in the bus! I think we accumulated a few dollars before forgetting about it. In high school, another friend and I joked that when we hit forty we’ll go share the awkwardness of prostrate exams together.

We’ll never make that trip.

This morning I found out my good friend passed away due to complications resulting from dermatomyositis. I recommend not looking at the photos of the disease. It just sounds awful. Once things got to a certain point, it seemed hopeless. That did not mean any of us gave up hope, believe me. The only reason I say that is because no matter how much I could accept the high possibility of what could happen, that never made me ready for it. My grade school friends and I are all the same age. Most of us have kids of our own now. These are just facts, but they are the only words I have right now. My son is not going to understand why I hugged him so tightly tonight.

I’ll miss you, Josh. I already do.