I was surprised, slightly, that between some translation work I was able to find myself at the end of Cave Story again, this time with all the right bits set to allow me to get the best ending.
I “”cheated”” in the sense that I looked up what to do. I still had to do it, however, which is where most of the joy comes from. The reflexive joy, if you will[ref]And no one will blame you if you do not.[/ref]. That clever joy, though, was missing. Did I feel bad? At the time I did not, and honestly I am so glad that I am making strides to completing this much harder version of the last dungeon that while playing the game I have no time to feel. Or think. Just act.
Then, there is the chance I would have screwed up my next play though and missed the chance for this best ending again and spent even more time. I hesitated when I started to type the word “wasted” there. That is such a loaded word because it really requires one to look into what is going on specifically into the time being spent. The gameplay was relaxing, and was helping me get more work done because I would return to it with a clearer mind. Of course from the “game goal” point of view, it would have been lost time.
So here I come pointing out the exact obvious stuff that everything is more complicated than it seems. Yeah. Everything. Even playing games. For fun.